Step Into Your Personal Power
Stepping into your power is essential for having impact and influence. Without it, you can’t effectively pursue your purpose nor manifest what matters most.
How many people do you need to get permission from before you live the life you want to live? How many times do you subject yourself to the expectations, opinions or beliefs of all these different people?
To what extent are you allowing others to govern how you rule your world? How much sway have you given others over your thoughts, ideas, opinions, habits and behaviors? How many bits and pieces of your personal power have you slivered away?
As social beings we are impressionable and care deeply about social norms. It's part of our evolutionary makeup. But there should be a limit to how much sway others have in determining our life course.
Why do you need power?
You may have stereotypical views about power that make you avoid or look down on it. However, in order to live with integrity and thrive in your life, you must recognize and step confidently into your personal power.
Power is a dynamic form of creative energy that allows us to exert some level of control over ourselves, others or situations and circumstances. Power is impact. It is influence. It is expression. And, it is manifestation. It makes things happen, or puts an end to happenings, in accordance with its intention.
In order to bring forth an idea, be a catalyst for change, direct the course of events or inspire individuals, you must have and use power. Just like your devices are lifeless until they are plugged into a source of electricity, your intentions will lay dormant until they are backed by power.
Lack of power is why you languish when focusing on nonessential pursuits. You convince yourself that you want these things but your subconscious knows they don’t really matter so, through self-sabotage, stops you from investing too much energy into them. In turn, you fail to obtain them and it leaves you feeling dissatisfied and wondering, now what?
What this means is that in order to live with integrity you have to first be clear about what matters to you most and then put power behind your true desires. It is not enough to determine your purpose, you must also take action and do the work.
How do you find power?
Stereotypical scenes of power are played out by public figures and people in "high" places. The boss, the celebrity, the influencer and the politician are examples of dominate clichés that color our perception of what power is. And because we often witness power being misused in these instances, it leaves a bad taste in our mouths. We think we either need to completely change who we are to pursue power, or avoid it altogether.
This is an unfortunate misperception, but it can easily be corrected. You can use self-inquiry to reveal how you may be unknowingly exerting power in your own unique way. Your power is in your authenticity, not in imitating the poor stewards of it. At the core of who you are as a person lies the key to your power. Unlock it by asking yourself probing questions such as:
What unique combinations of ideas, talents and other gifts do I have at my disposal?
How does my energy act on and through people, places and situations?
When I appear, what seems to shift in a space or environment?
When I make a contribution, how do ideas and plans tend to progress?
How can I nurture my distinct approach to power without undermining or belittling others?
As you begin to explore and experiment with your power, you will see yourself flourish personally, creatively and professionally. During this time many will be inspired by your increased confidence, yet there will also be some who are threatened by it. Their misplaced emotions are not (and should never be) your problem as they are merely projecting their insecurities onto you.
Don't risk a setback just because someone doesn't like where you are now or where you are going. Don't become undone or undermine all of the work you've put into building your confidence. Because the only thing worse than a superiority complex is an inferiority complex — unrealistic feelings of low worth and esteem that lead to self-deprecating behavior. Protect against this by practicing the following:
Assertiveness — stand up for yourself and guard your energy by clearly communicating your standards and boundaries.
Independence — lessen your dependence on external validation and flattery, and know your worth with or without it.
Discernment — distinguish between constructive feedback and useless opinion, and disregard the latter.
How can you use your power?
Upon identifying your authentic approach to power, leverage it to transform thoughts to things, goals to accomplishments and wishes to reality. Once you build confidence in your suite of power tools all you need to do going forward is select the appropriate tool for the job and flip the ‘on’ switch.
American novelist Alice Walker once made the statement “the most common way people give up their power is by thinking they don’t have any.” If you don't see and own your personal power and stop pandering to the whims of others, you will remain small and your life will not resemble your vision. It will look more like a poorly stitched patchwork of other people's fancies.
The only person you need to ask for permission to be who you want to be is you. Start by incorporating that as a general rule. Exercise your autonomy, act with authority, and you will gradually and naturally begin to command more of your life.
