Why I’m the Happiest Person I Know

Julia Roberts, Pretty Woman (1990)

I'm the happiest person I know, but this is not a judgment call on anyone else's level of happiness. It's a declaration of contentment with my own life.

Why am I so happy? Because I'm not in competition with others, which means I rarely compare and contrast my life to theirs. I don't look to anyone else for direction, so my journey is not overly influenced by them.

My self-satisfaction is so deep that I don't envy anyone else. If I observe that someone has something appealing, I determine whether it's worth having. If it matters to me, I decide if I want to pursue it. If not, then I admire without desire.

My life is not perfect. I have several unfulfilled wishes that may or may not be granted. However, my lack is not exasperated by external voices that try to chip away at my self-esteem. I refuse to let outer noise interfere with my inner peace.

Another reason why I'm so happy is that my life is enjoyable even though I don't have everything I want. Pleasure is my purpose, and leisure is my leading aspiration. And with philosophy as my favorite pastime, my days are constantly filled with wonder.

Happiness is sourced from within and is not something you find but cultivate. If you are not the happiest person you know, here’s what you can do to change that.

Understand your nature

From personality tests to astrology readings, use available psychological and spiritual tools to understand who you are. Self-knowledge through self-inquiry will expose your nature and help you craft your own path so you don't have to blindly follow someone else's.

I pride myself on knowing myself and that inner knowledge is central to my personal power. My north star is not in the sky but inside. I can trust my intuition because I've done the shadow work to expose and refine it, ensuring it won't lead me astray.

Focus on what matters

I am a broken record on the critical need to determine and fixate on what matters most, as it is fundamental to designing a life you love. You can never be content without this as the guiding force in your life. Without it, you will always be a follower.

To be a leader, particularly of my own life, I mind my business. I exert most of my energy on what I care about and don't get caught up in what other people are doing. My personal growth drives my thoughts, habits, and actions, leaving little room for things that aren't in alignment.

Ignore everything else

Once you've determined who and what matters to you, fortify yourself against distractors. The days of being impressionable are over. You should still be open-minded and, therefore, open to high-caliber ideas and influences. However, you must discern and protect yourself from low-grade inputs that divert you from your path.

I am not on social media because I'm not interested in performative posts about random people's lives, nor do I wish to be inundated with unsolicited ads. Instead, I interact directly with the individuals I care about. I seek the outlets I want to inform and inspire me, and I don't subject my psyche to arbitrary content.

We are all vulnerable to societal norms and social pressures, but there should be a hard limit on how much sway they have. We have enduring happiness when we stand in our personal power and decide to live life on our own terms.